Cat of many guises

Hello, it is me(iow) Pepper -
 the fearless Yorkshire Wild Cat (living in Lancashire), 

I have been given free paw to tap out a note or two.

About time I say, (and according to my humans I have a lot to say... how rude!)

I will take you out with me
 show you how a real Yorkshire Wild Cat (living in Lancashire)
stalks, checking the perimeter fence along the territory

Grrrrrrr (cough) Hear me RoAr and fear me (squeek)

It all started on Saturday morning, 

with my nose a-twitching and my whiskers a-quiver

I demand my humans let me out

I am not a house cat 

(although my humans keep me incarcerated - they say it is for my own good) 

PaH! I am a fearless Yorkshire Wild Cat (living in Lancashire)

and can pull off wearing a harness with such purrrrnache!

However, my humans have to put the damn thing on me first!

I can scale trees - for I am a fearless ...

(yes yes I know you know what I am, but I have to say it often!)

My own personal human (a rather tall lanky creature)

needs playing with, so kindly I deign to do so.

He seems to like it. 

He needs to learn to purr, instead of his yelping sort of happy sound.

I climb trees to a heady height - just a quick paw's reach to the garage roof

I am destined for a loftier life

for greater

higher

things

I am alert, my whiskers are radar ready and I am wild 

I am cat, fear me

Oh oooh errr,

I feel a little dizzy...

Help!

Human - a little help would be nice! (NOW!)

Phew, managed to turn round without disgracing myself (too much)

 

 Think I need to get off this lofty branch

down to terra firma

For I am cat

master of the savannah

the prairie

the ground (quickly)

I survey the grasslands

I smell the air

I stalk

I spy

I sit and ponder

and watch

the wild creatures of the plains

(silly creatures that cluck and crow)

I am lost in deep cat thoughts

I am cat, I have no concept of time

however this human time-y-wime-y sundialy thing 

makes a good vantage spot

 Where I can launch myself

upon unsuspecting prey

(Flies and beetles beware!!) 

I shall lie

and dream

and watch for birds

for I am cat

fear me

(yawn)

I need to rest,

I have done my duty

I have toured the perimeter fence

I have scaled heights

stared at chickens

pounced on flies

sunbathed

grumbled

purred

zzzzzzzzz