Cows... do...not...moo...
Nope, they
do not.
All these
years we have been led down a farmery pathway of fabrication. I can
unconditionally confirm that cows.do.not.say.'moo'.
I spent a week - well just shy of that- on a dairy farm with a field full of very
vocal and loquacious cows. They had an awful lot to say....All day.
All through
the night. Especially the night.
Or when the
farmer drove by.....
or walked
by.....
or wasn't
even there...
Oh and at
milking time when their herdmates are off being milked, these fishwife cows
have been very voraciously putting their views forward and it went something like
this...
Deep husky
drawing of breath MwaaaaAAAHeeek MwaaaaAAAHeeek (a
huge bellow tailing off followed with a final HA and finishing with a trebbling
squeak)
HAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaHHHH gasp
for lungful HAAAAAaaaaaaaaaHHHeeeeek
gasp for breath HHHHHAAAAAAAAWWWWW.
Then an
equally vocal bovine neighbour responding with BAAAAAAAAHHHWWWWW wheeek(she has a strange squeaking gasp)
BaaaAAAAAAAHHHWWWWWWW wkeeeek.
BAAAAAAAHHHHWWWWWW
wheeek
THEN ! in the
distance and getting louder as she walked closer
bah gasp
bah gasp BAH gasp BAH gasp BAAAAAAAAAHHHH
Another cow had a witty retort back MRUAWWHUH
MRUAWWHUH MRUAWWHUH (she must have been breathing through her ears, she
didn't stop for breath during this part of the debate).
If you look
closely, cows don't press their lips together to make the MMMM sound at all,
nope, they straighten their necks out, heads up, eyes wide and go HHHAAWW or
BAAAHGHGH or MwaaaaAAAHeeek .
The only
time I heard anything remotely like a 'moo' was when one complaining cow looked
across the gate, without opening her mouth made a rumbling grumble from deep in
her throat and said MMMMMMmmmmmMMMMMMMMMmmmm cough.
Oh and
while we are at it - farm dogs don't go woof or say anything vaguely sounding
like bark. This lot said things like....Wurrrrrrr
wrrrrrrrrrrrrr or WOAH WOAH and even Hurrr Hufff HUUUFFF Huurrrr (reserved for
the mobile ice cream seller) and today's dog word for the day is wurrrrrrrrrrrrr wurrrrrrrrrrr!
There. I
have said it. I have broken the myth.
Done.
You really are so funny Hawthorn, what a sense of humour, and amongst all the other little descriptions and exclamations that you have entertained me with, I am still laughing out loud and wondering how on earth a cow breathes through her ears. Thanks so much for this, you've made my day! Oh, and I must congratulate you on your marvellous photos - well done; what camera did you use? xoJoy
ReplyDeleteWell, another myth blown out of the water! I will still think of cows saying moo as I can more easily say moo than the vocalisations you so vividly wrote about above. I suppose that is why cows do not talk to me....
ReplyDeleteAs TTML says, another myth debunked. Now someone with have to rerwrite Old MacDonald Had a Farm, Though I can't see......with a MwaaaaAAAHeeek here and a HAAAAAaaaaaaaaaHHHeeeeek there ..... will catch on!!
ReplyDeleteAre you sure they weren't all just plain drunk?
ReplyDeleteThank you for making me laugh this morning!
I'll take your word for it Hawthorn! You sound quite the expert on Cow phonetics and even branching out into the canine lingua.
ReplyDeleteI don't recall cows as being very mooey or even chatty when I was a child! I always got the big silence everytime I skirted around (never taking my eyes off of them in case)them at my sister's husband's farm in Kinghtsbridge Devon to cut across the fields. I found them quite frightening then!
I have to add I had quite a giggle at this vivid description. It was fun to read!
keep well
Amanda x
I love your cow photos - you've really captured their personalities! x
ReplyDeleteBrilliant! And I love all the bovine pics :)
ReplyDelete