Just about bordering on odd, I see things through different eyes.The heading says it all - I live, I love, I craft, I am me...

20/07/2014

Cows do not moo....

Cows... do...not...moo...






Nope, they do not.
All these years we have been led down a farmery pathway of fabrication. I can unconditionally confirm that cows.do.not.say.'moo'.

I spent a week - well just shy of that- on a dairy farm with a field full of very vocal and loquacious cows. They had an awful lot to say....All day.

All through the night. Especially the night.

Or when the farmer drove by.....
or walked by.....
or wasn't even there...

Oh and at milking time when their herdmates are off being milked, these fishwife cows have been very voraciously putting their views forward and it went something like this...

Deep husky drawing of breath MwaaaaAAAHeeek  MwaaaaAAAHeeek (a huge bellow tailing off followed with a final HA and finishing with a trebbling squeak)
HAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaHHHH gasp for lungful HAAAAAaaaaaaaaaHHHeeeeek gasp for breath HHHHHAAAAAAAAWWWWW.

Then an equally vocal bovine neighbour responding with BAAAAAAAAHHHWWWWW wheeek(she has a strange squeaking gasp) BaaaAAAAAAAHHHWWWWWWW  wkeeeek. 
BAAAAAAAHHHHWWWWWW wheeek
THEN !  in the distance and getting louder as she walked closer

bah gasp bah gasp BAH gasp BAH gasp BAAAAAAAAAHHHH

Another cow had a witty retort back MRUAWWHUH MRUAWWHUH MRUAWWHUH (she must have been breathing through her ears, she didn't stop for breath during this part of the debate).

If you look closely, cows don't press their lips together to make the MMMM sound at all, nope, they straighten their necks out, heads up, eyes wide and go HHHAAWW or BAAAHGHGH or  MwaaaaAAAHeeek .

The only time I heard anything remotely like a 'moo' was when one complaining cow looked across the gate, without opening her mouth made a rumbling grumble from deep in her throat and said MMMMMMmmmmmMMMMMMMMMmmmm cough.



Oh and while we are at it - farm dogs don't go woof or say anything vaguely sounding like bark. This lot said things like....Wurrrrrrr wrrrrrrrrrrrrr or WOAH WOAH and even Hurrr Hufff HUUUFFF Huurrrr (reserved for the mobile ice cream seller) and today's dog word for the day is wurrrrrrrrrrrrr wurrrrrrrrrrr!

There. I have said it. I have broken the myth.

Done.


7 comments:

  1. You really are so funny Hawthorn, what a sense of humour, and amongst all the other little descriptions and exclamations that you have entertained me with, I am still laughing out loud and wondering how on earth a cow breathes through her ears. Thanks so much for this, you've made my day! Oh, and I must congratulate you on your marvellous photos - well done; what camera did you use? xoJoy

    ReplyDelete
  2. Well, another myth blown out of the water! I will still think of cows saying moo as I can more easily say moo than the vocalisations you so vividly wrote about above. I suppose that is why cows do not talk to me....

    ReplyDelete
  3. As TTML says, another myth debunked. Now someone with have to rerwrite Old MacDonald Had a Farm, Though I can't see......with a MwaaaaAAAHeeek here and a HAAAAAaaaaaaaaaHHHeeeeek there ..... will catch on!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Are you sure they weren't all just plain drunk?
    Thank you for making me laugh this morning!

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'll take your word for it Hawthorn! You sound quite the expert on Cow phonetics and even branching out into the canine lingua.
    I don't recall cows as being very mooey or even chatty when I was a child! I always got the big silence everytime I skirted around (never taking my eyes off of them in case)them at my sister's husband's farm in Kinghtsbridge Devon to cut across the fields. I found them quite frightening then!
    I have to add I had quite a giggle at this vivid description. It was fun to read!

    keep well

    Amanda x

    ReplyDelete
  6. I love your cow photos - you've really captured their personalities! x

    ReplyDelete
  7. Brilliant! And I love all the bovine pics :)

    ReplyDelete

Hi there...

Thank you ever so much for stopping by today - I'm really glad that you did. If you would like to leave me a comment then I would be delighted to hear from you,

Hawthorn x
Sadly anyone signing anonymous will not be published